Our busy days unfold like the Page-a-Day calendar that quickly melds into weeks, months and years. As time flitters by we internally crave meaning and fulfillment in our lives – hoping that we won’t look back some day and regretfully say, “Is that all there is?” or, “Success...but at what cost?”
Deep in our hearts we know that we are the managers of our own lives. Solely responsible! Dr. Phil frequently affirms this self-knowledge. So how can we best affect the outcomes throughout our lives?
There are many self-help books for improving and transforming our lives. Yet we all know people who already have it together – who have mastered filling their lives with what matters most. You can master this as well! Personal (life) mastery goes beyond competence and skills. It means approaching one’s individual life as a creative work – living life from a creative, positive and proactive viewpoint, as opposed to a reactive one. It is being able to work with the forces of change – not resisting them. This requires some personal work. It means thinking positive, and integrating into our personal/professional roles those daily, weekly, monthly, yearly goals that are rooted in our (identified) core values. Core values act as our anchor poles – essential to our lives having meaning and purpose for all of the many life roles we play.
So, from the life-manager-responsibility standpoint, have we actually taken the deeper personal-insight-time to honor and lift up our personal core values? And then decided how we want to have these core values show up in the various roles we play day-in and day-out? Have we scheduled into our calendar/planners, that which does matter most? Like the title of the popular self-help book, I Will Not Die an Unlived Life by Dawna Markova, we need to live fully! We can start today – at this juncture and date on the personal Page-a-Day calendar. It can start (simply) with accepting personal responsibility for the choice of words we use!
Immediately, we can begin to use conscious creative language to effect positive outcomes in our lives!
Conscious means to be fully aware; to be deliberate, intentional. Creative is proactivity in the making; to bring into being. We can take the initiative by using words that come out of our mouths to actually act in advance – rather than simply react to circumstances and events. By consciously choosing the words we say, we can further empower ourselves. Here are some examples:
• Eliminate indifference. The next time you’re asked what or where you want to do or go, be definitive. Never say “I don’t know; it doesn’t matter”. It does matter. With indifference in your language, you give your power away. Instead, be empowering...choose!
• Eliminate problem from your vocabulary. Replace it with challenge. As soon as you do that, the negativity associated with the problem is replaced with a positive array of ways and means to rise to the challenge. (It is human nature!)
• No more buts. “But” is a word of cancellation. It negates everything that was said before it. “I love your new office...but where are the windows?” If you have to use but, don’t even bother to say anything. But translates into the negative.
• Eliminate the word want. Instead, use the word choose. When you use the word want, you essentially keep your-self in a state of wanting. (I want a better job; I want a better relationship; I want to lose weight. Want translates to a continual state of wanting!). Instead, choose. (I choose to have a better job; I choose to have a better relationship; I choose to be thinner.) Once you deliberately choose, your awareness will begin to notice and beckon all the things that are necessary for you to move forward. You begin to deliberately create the future consistent with your choice. Once you’ve chosen, your future vision kicks in – it is like looking through a pair of binoculars; if the lens cover is on, you cannot see anything. You are rambling.
With a clear view, however, and your “choice” in focus, you now have a target for positively moving toward.
• Deliberately and consciously build these words into your language:
I will enjoy.
These are positive, forward moving words. Next, give yourself permission to do the very thing your words endorse; that is, to choose, to do, to be, to have, to create, to love, to enjoy. The more you use these positive words (and conversely don’t use their negative opposites), the more you’ll find that your proactive words will positively lift you up and move you forward.
• Work to consciously and deliberately develop this positive practice. Remember, YOU are the manager of your life and solely responsible for how it plays out – so use this creative language process to positively influence your life outcomes. As ye think, so shall ye be.
BNC member Claire Knowles is a 2-time Amazon best-selling author, including the book, Can You See Them Now? Elephants in our Midst. A speaker and business leadership consultant, she helps leaders and their teams become the most effective they can be at accomplishing goals (together). Contact her at 716-622-7753 or www.ClaireEKnowles.com.